The Rat Patrol rode to The Mutiny, a local dive, last night. One of our members had a gig with his band Jumpsuit. He wanted to have the long line of choppers out front, like the movie cliche where the awkward guy knocks over all the Harleys and the bikers come out and beat him up.

It was four degrees out. First time all winter that I've been uncomfortable... Last Saturday was the annual Tiki ride to the Hala Kahiki Tiki Lounge in River Grove IL... only about 22 miles round trip, I did it on Count Chopula. It was 13 degrees, and I found it very pleasant. Tiki isn't really my thing, but I can see the appeal... a lot of the hipsters round here are not only into the whole Tiki/Lounge Lizard thing, some of them are "Post-Tiki", whatever that means. They had an eight-page menu of drinks, but I'm allergic to rum, and so I was limited to about 10% of them. Too bad, too, I wanted to get the Volcano, a huge ceramic volcano with a frozen drink around the sides and a flaming cone filled with Rum 151.

Today it's minus 3. I have a saying, "if it's above zero, you're no hero. If it's not plus, take the bus, unless you're talking Celsius." I've certainly grown accustomed to having icicles in my beard. It's odd, that huge winged bike, while quite aerodynamic from the front, is like a billboard from the side... I've been blown off of it before. So I'd rather it be 10 degrees and calm than 60 degrees and windy. But I've discovered that 10 degrees is when I officially declare it "cold".